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The 38-year-old reptile sits down with TheComedyPage to discuss his new book “Coke & Cowabunga: The True Story of the TMNT” It is a mild afternoon in January and we are sitting outside a Greek café in the Lower East Side. Michelangelo, or “Mikey” as he is known to his friends, leans back into his chair as the …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=174
I’d like to take a moment to apologize to a small but special group of people in the world-the other Justin Hagermans. I was bored at work today so I Googled myself for the first time. I would now like to take this opportunity to say “I’m sorry.” I cannot imagine how hard life has …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=165
Recent budget cutbacks have forced NASA to cancel their Mars exploration program, even as most scientists agree that we are closer than ever to finding life on the planet. This is aggravating to me, so I hit the streets and asked people how they would save the Mars mission. Here were the most popular suggestions: …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=139
I really thought I was done with this shit. I last updated this site in 2009, at which time I decided I was finished with blogging. I had been posting regularly for a few years so I figured this site had enough content to appease everyone. Sure, most of it was from 1998, but so what? …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=48
Just changed everything over to WordPress. This page is going to look sad for awhile. If you can still see a stock photo pic of a pine cone at the top of the page then you know I still have no idea what I am doing. Check back soon(ish)! -Justin
Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=1
What a crappy apocalypse. Seriously, what a let down. Polar bears drowning? Baby boomers losing their 401(k)s? A successful Vin Diesel movie? If this apocalypse were a movie, I’d walk out. Jerry Bruckheimer could direct a better end-of-the-world story than God has. Every major religion from Christianity to Nostradamus-ity has been hyping a kick-ass apocalypse …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=127
I am sad to report that a close friend of mine was lost last week. We first met about a year and 1/2 ago, but didn’t truly become close until just a few months ago, when I was laid off. He was a pillar of strength during those trying times. When crushing boredom threatened my …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=123
I finally received my rebate check, and it’s about damn time. It still feels weird getting money for doing nothing. I mean, at least hobos weather the elements and beg for it, or think up some elaborate Vietnam backstory (despite being only 35 years old) to get some pity change. Don’t get me wrong, I’m …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=120
I read today that Bill Gates has retired. Reporters seem to be focusing on all that Mr. Gates has contributed to computing/modern technology, and while that’s very interesting, no one seems to be discussing what history’s richest man will be doing in retirement. Bill seems to have limitless possibilities on how to enjoy his downtime, …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=118
It seems like you can’t turn on the TV nowadays without being overwhelmed by political news, tickers, blogs, polls, statistics, commentators, Wolf Blitzer, pundits, Wolf Blitzer, predictions, or Wolf Blitzer. I used to be really into this stuff, too. Man, I could tell you who you were voting for before you even knew who you …
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Permanent link to this article: http://thecomedypage.com/?p=109
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